Makin’ Whoopee


Not THAT kind of Whoopee. Not with all the fart noises in the background. You see, Sally has discovered the unending hysterics of foofs. That’s what we call them. Foofs.  Cute, right?

At my parents’ house recently, we were having hot dogs for lunch. My father went to squeeze the nearly empty bottle of mustard, and instead of condiment he got that moist foof sound.

Sally, mouth full of bun and ketchup, nearly died of the giggles. She could barely sit up, chewed wiener in full view. And naturally, her fit of the funnies made us all laugh. Because our angelic 3-year-old had just discovered the humor in the sound of passing gas.

Note: Only those of us with one child would think this is adorable. I’m pretty sure the rest of the world tries to squelch this kind of behavior.

So it was funny, yada yada, we relayed the story to every family member who came through the front door as if Sally had won a Nobel prize, and then it was over, right?

Wrong.

Sally’s grandfather produced a whoopee cushion. A SELF-INFLATING whoopee cushion–all the fun with none of the work. So, it really is fine and everything, Pop, but it has changed our lives.

Yesterday after work:

“Did you have fun with Daddy today?” ffffffftttt. “SALLY, did you have fun?”

“Yes! Mommy, say ‘I don’t EVER foof!’ ”

“Okay. I don’t EVER–” ffffffbbbt. [Child collapses in fit of laughter.]

At the dinner table:

flubbbtt. “Sally, that’s not for the dinner table.”

“But I need it!” feeeebbtt.

“NO.” [Remove offensive disgusting toy.] [Child angry.]

Bedtime:

“I need my whoopee cushion.”

“No, it’s time for bed.”

“I can sleep with it.”

“NO.”

“But it’s FUN!” fllrrrbt. [laughter] “Mommy, say ‘I don’t EVER foof!’ ”

“Idon’teverfoof.” flrrrggrrrbt. [laughter. Mother yells over giggles.] “ENOUGH. Into bed.”

….ffft.

Advertisements

6 responses to “Makin’ Whoopee

  1. Try having two boys who’ve discovered the magic and power of foofs and their innate ability to transform an otherwise comfortable, peaceful and civil environment into an ill-mannered, riotous, malodorous, scene of disgust! Ah, parenting! fffft.

  2. Who doesn’t love some good old fashioned potty humor?!

  3. haha!! I love it, finally the foof humor is in full gear. And, now, why can’t she sleep with it? She sleeps with all her other favorites..

  4. Well then she should really love her Uncle Mark a lot. He will provide her with a ton of good entertainment. I, however, am over it!

  5. I’m laughing so hard, I’m crying. Funniest post yet! HA! HA! HA!

  6. Don’t forget that she really started this… So, I figure the best way to get past somethings is to “dive right in”…Think of this as getting over potty humor, early in life! If this doesn’t work out as predicted, I will try to give her some other (probably annoying) humoristic genre to explore, thereby replacing the potty humor phase! (It won’t work though)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s